If
there is any lesson at all I have learnt, in these two score years and more, it
is this: nothing in life is a given. In my dictionary, everything is to be
earned. One’s peace, happiness, prosperity, none of this may be presumed as a given. Yes,
there are people who do seem like they have all the luck in the world but really, who is to
say what is really going on with these haloed folks.
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| Aqseer in Belgrade Central |
Sadly,
one of the human life’s most abused aspects, taken for granted and kicked
around is that of personal relationships. Families are the worst culprits many
a times. You wonder where, how and why the myth of nurturing and nourishing
units started. Theoretically, a family ought to be an empowering and enabling dynamo
of a fuselage. In reality, there is no dearth of bands that cripple and crush.
Perhaps they assume that the common plasma running in their veins will keep
their lives permanently sparkling with the silver dust of loyalty and love. Bonds
are amazingly presumed to be a given, where there is a genetic flow chart in evidence.
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| Aqseer with Asawari and her home-stay Mom Nada |
The
fact is that like everything else in life, family joy needs work, planning
and perseverance. There are focal points yes, the chief radiators of warmth and
connection, cementing ties and holding it all; very often it is the mother who is the glue that keeps everyone
together. She does this by reminding everyone of the significant family dates,
nudging members towards each other with her carrot and the stick tango and by
plugging into the emotional ether of the clan. Behind every close knit family,
there is someone on the ball, patching, soothing, reassuring and appreciating.
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| Roman ruins in Nis |
When
Asawari left home on the international program, there was a real and genuine
fear of a distance creeping in, of the sisters drifting apart, of the family
and her losing out on each other. An effort had to be made to keep the
connection pulsating and meaningful. This is not to say that children leaving
home set out to break away for good but the lack of physical proximity does have
the potential to drain the ties, if not guarded against.
A
family is one of nature’s most beautiful gifts.
A
family that has been invested in and is a life affirming kindred, in the true spirit of the word is a
blessing indeed.
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